


Overcome

by CaptainCinderBella



Category: An Ember in the Ashes - Sabaa Tahir
Genre: F/M, Keenan POV, Major spoilers for a Sky beyond, unhealthy relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2020-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:53:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28028838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainCinderBella/pseuds/CaptainCinderBella
Summary: The scene in the cellar, extended version, Keenan POV. Contains MAJOR spoilers for book 2, 3 and 4.
Relationships: Laia/Keenan
Comments: 7
Kudos: 7





	Overcome

_Trust me,_ I command silently as I pluck the pins from her hair, letting the soft, midnight curtain down over her shoulders. Her eyes, those brilliant golden eyes, look deeply into mine.

Something is different about Laia. It was not something I recognized at first, at least not anything beyond the bracelet. _This_ something is deeper, a more ingrained part of her soul. A tinge of fae, of magic. She herself doesn't know where her power comes from. It doesn't matter, I tell myself. This is temporary, a distraction, a step in a larger plan. The nature of her magic matters not. 

_Liar_ , an inner voice whispers to me. _You love her more than any of them. You love her like you love your own kind._

 _Quiet_ , I snarl at the voice. I love Laia of Serra like I loved the others, and like them, I will betray that love. It is what I do. The Beloved has become the Forsaken, carving out a wound in this world to match his own pain.

As if she knows what I am thinking, Laia tenses in my lap, a flicker of unease showing.

I close my eyes, hiding the feelings reflected there, and kiss her. Desire roars through me with all the potency of a djinn flame. I pull her closer, pressing our bodies together.

Her hands roam aimlessly across my shoulders and arms. I wonder if I have frightened her with the insistence of my kiss, when her thighs, on each side of my waist, tighten their hold on me.

Encouraged, I kiss her jaw and neck, letting my teeth scrape gently across her skin, then move down to her collarbone and shoulder, pulling aside her too large shirt for more access.

She makes a low, needy sound, my false name slipping out through her breath. "Keenan."

With surprisingly sure movements, she pulls off my shirt. I warm the air between us but she is unaware of the magical nature of it, too lost in her need. I feel a thrill of satisfaction as her eyes take in my human form, avidly tracing my skin, down, down until her lean hands settle on my hips.

I catch her hands in mine, holding them against my chest, letting her feel my thundering heartbeat there. I search her face, despite knowing already what is there. But I want, I _need_ her to say it, to tell me this is what she wants. Still, I can't quite mask the urgency from my voice, the plea behind it.

"Laia," I say, "If you want me to stop…"

The final remnant of her hesitation shatters then, and in her face I see nothing but love and trust. She takes my hand, guiding me. My human form trembles, my breath tight as I open the buttons of her shirt, one by one. 

"No, I don't want you to stop," she says.

I swallow as her shirt falls open. Laia is staggeringly beautiful, all gold brown skin, smooth and curved in all the right places. Keris' K marrs her youthful perfection but that only makes her more desirable. I wish I could drink her suffering from that scar. I'd revel and bask in it. Instead, I let my lips roam to all the places I know will fan her lust. 

As 'Keenan' I have not had many lovers. The few times it has happened have been for appearance's sake, nothing more. I have no interest in carnal distractions, unless it furthers a very clear, very specific, goal. But Laia… with Laia I am not so sure. 

With swift, impatient movements I make a bed for us on the floor, using our blankets and cloaks. Elias' redundant map is carelessly brushed aside. Laia willingly lies down under me and though the bulk of my body shades her from the light, her golden eyes seem to glow. I have never seen anything like this before.

I wasn't lying when I told her I hadn't felt this way since my family was killed. Laia has her hooks inside me, and I wonder for a moment who is really being deceived. With every day I fear I will be too honest, too open. That this strange magic of hers will break me open and ruin all that I have worked for.

 _What are you?_ I wonder for the hundredth time.

"Have you done this before?" I ask gently.

"No," she admits with a note of uncertainty.

She blushes. I lie down over her, enveloping her, warming her with kisses and caresses. Her hands flutter over my back, my shoulders. She doesn't know what to do. It is just as well. I want her to lean on me, to feel the weight of my experience, in this and in all things.

The rest of our clothes come off. The air warms around us. She doesn't notice, doesn't question. All her thoughts are on the places where our bodies touch, her breaths a delicate flutter against my face. Her eyes are half closed, her mind open and trusting.

My caresses and kisses pull moans and sighs from her, until she is trembling with pent up need. But when I line up our bodies, she tenses, the fog clearing from her eyes.

"Laia?" I ask, the perfect impression of a compassionate first lover.

She gives a tight nod, every part of her tense, bracing for pain. "It's fine."

She is afraid.

"Do you think it will hurt?" I ask, smiling wryly, as if the idea is absurd. 

She looks embarrassed, stammering. "I- I mean, I have heard that… sometimes, a woman's first time… And you're not exactly…" She buries her face against my neck and the rest of her words are a mortified mumble. "The smallest I've seen."

I laugh quietly, kissing her flushed skin. "Just relax. I won't hurt you. I would never hurt you."

A lie, of course, but a necessary one. 

I press into her, slowly, careful to gauge her face for any sign of discomfort at my invasion. And just as I promised, there's no pain, only curiosity and trust - so much trust. 

I pause, letting her get used to the sensation. "How does it feel?" I ask. 

Laia looks at me with such intensity I wonder if she somehow realizes who - what - I am. As if she sees straight through my human shell. But she only nods. 

"Feels good," she says, and lifts her body against mine, eliciting a groan from both of us. 

Carefully, I begin to move. She lets me set the pace. By the time my own pleasure begins to build, Laia matches my sounds with her own. I move one hand between us to caress her most sensitive part with my thumb, and her sounds go from pleasure to pleading.

"Oh- K- Keenan…" She sucks in a breath as if she has forgotten how to breathe.

"Laia," I moan back. "I'm going to, to…"

"Yes!" she urges me on. "Just… don't stop."

I wait for her release before I allow my own, and when it comes - her eyes on me, my name on her lips, her body quivering around and under me - I am suddenly overcome. For a moment, my focus is solely on keeping my form together, to not lose myself to the raging fire inside, begging to be released. I close my eyes, knowing if I meet her gaze, she'd see them glow bright as a sun. The wave breaks and I shudder over her, not sure if I perhaps called her name aloud or someone else's. 

Someone I know to be dead.

Laia stills under me, looking at me with hurt and confusion. 

_Oh no._

"Who is Remet?" she asks quietly, even as our bodies remain joined.

I curse my mistake as I draw on my magic, looking deep into her eyes, setting right the memory. It will affect her, she'll know something is wrong. But she won't remember. 

_Forgive me, my Queen._

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't stop thinking about this scene after book 2, and even more after finishing book 4. I had all sorts of theories about Keenan's weirdness at that point, but nothing prepared me for *that* plot twist!
> 
> Thank you [Shriyazizi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shriyazizim/pseuds/Shriyazizim) for beta.


End file.
